Responsibilities aren't gender-bound!

Hello! 👋

New subscribers, welcome!

In She Got You, I feature conversations with women professionals from diverse backgrounds and talk about what matters to us: women and the future of work for women. ✨

In today’s edition, I share my conversation with Heena Bajaj, Associate Product Manager at Sirion, a Silver Medalist in undergrad university, an ISB graduate (2024), and a fitness enthusiast.

I had a ball talking to Heena about her accomplishments and personal ambitions. The fact that she deals with difficulties with humour is quite something! Interested in knowing more?

Here’s how she’s got you! 👇

Sunaina: Tell me about yourself and what you do.

Heena: I'm from Kharar, a small town in Punjab's Mohali district. I hold an engineering degree from Panjab University and recently completed my MBA at ISB Hyderabad. I work as an Associate Product Manager at Sirion.

Beyond work, fitness and reading are my passions. Running, especially marathons, has been a significant part of my life. However, the demanding MBA curriculum required my undivided attention to secure a place on the Merit List, a goal deeply rooted in my desire to make my father proud. This singular focus is a testament to my personality—I prefer to excel in one area rather than dividing my attention across multiple pursuits.

Sunaina: What made you pick ISB?

Heena: In 2019, after years as a developer and data analyst, I decided to pursue a long-held dream of earning a Master's degree. Initially, I aimed for IIM Calcutta's Analytics program but missed the cutoff. I expanded my search, taking the GMAT and applying to MBA programs. I was set on Ivy League schools and top Indian institutions. I sought advice from alums on LinkedIn to refine my profile and application strategy.

I hired a consultant who also recommended retaking the GMAT, but with self-doubt mounting and a personal timeline looming, I prioritised my goals. I mapped out my priorities in an Excel sheet, balancing career aspirations with a personal desire to be married and successful by 30—a self-imposed deadline, not a parental expectation.

Ultimately, I received offers from Carnegie Mellon University and ISB, Hyderabad. I chose ISB for its one-year program and proximity to family in India. However, at ISB, my past still bit me. Top-tier companies passed over me due to my lack of a degree from a premier engineering institution.

Sunaina: I know what you mean exactly! I still feel I should've worked harder for engineering entrance exams.

Heena: Exactly, right? These thoughts linger even eight years after completing my engineering degree. My family supported my ambitions despite financial constraints by sending me to top coaching institutes. However, I didn't make it into IIT. My educational journey began in a small government school until 3rd grade, followed by a private school so small that my 10th-grade class had only 18 students.

With a 720 GMAT score, I was waitlisted at several premier US universities, including MIT and UC Berkeley. The uncertainty of waitlist outcomes created a sense of rejection, motivating me to strengthen my application further.

Sunaina: Got it! So, let's go back to your life after engineering. Did you move out of Mohali for the first time for a job? What was that experience like?

Heena: My curfew in engineering was 6 pm, and I never broke the rule. My college ended at 5 pm—I could've hung out with friends, but I never chose to because I assumed my parents would be disappointed in me. After securing job offers in Chandigarh and Bengaluru after engineering, I chose the latter.

The move to Bengaluru initially led to some detachment from home, but a friend urged me to maintain regular contact with my family. Even at a distance, it never felt like I could make independent decisions—and I still don't think I can because I grew up in an environment where my father and elder brother were involved in all decision-making. Despite living in Bengaluru for over a year, I rarely explored, only taking a few trips with parental approval. Soon, I moved to Gurgaon because I was pretty attached to my younger sister, who wasn't having a good time without me.

I advocated for her education in Chandigarh because I understood the value of proper exposure. Though she faced initial challenges transitioning from a small to a large school, she's now more confident than me and is pursuing her CA.

She says she will make it. And that's enough!

Sunaina: You have an Instagram account for fitness, right? When did you get into fitness?

Heena: In Bengaluru, I found a newfound freedom to focus on fitness. In my hometown, my family was reluctant to send me to the gym late in the evenings, but in Bengaluru, I had access to my society's gym. I got fitter and started making videos.

When I relocated to Gurgaon, I wanted to pursue content creation around fitness because I was fit enough. At least fit enough for people to think I was fit, which I know is wrong because you have to be overall fit. I paused the account because of health issues but also because I knew my family wouldn't support me if I wanted to pursue this as a career.

However, I continued focusing on fitness. In 2022, I ran a 21 km marathon with my brother; in 2023, I did Devils Circuit. Despite not being at my peak fitness, I found satisfaction in still running, regardless of metrics. While I struggled with some strength tasks, I reflected on how I might have performed better in 2018.

Sunaina: Did you ever experience gender discrimination at work?

Heena: Several times! For instance, we introduced ourselves during a call with senior leadership at a former company. When my turn came, my manager introduced me instead. I unmuted myself but realised there was nothing to say because I had already been introduced.

In my head, I thought, "Oh, wow! That's me? Sure! He realised his mistake shortly after, but why should it happen? I should've been allowed to introduce myself like my male colleagues. It was disheartening and inappropriate.

It was a minor oversight, but it highlighted a bigger problem.

Honestly, the gender pay gap is a well-documented issue, and there’s more dialogue around it now, but it's the underlying mindset that needs to change. Despite solid performance, women frequently receive lower compensation. Beyond salary, there's a pervasive underestimation of women's capabilities. 

These things should change—and I don't know how they'll change. I don't want a senior to introduce me or someone to take credit when you make presentations or work that deserves appreciation. But these things happen, and I don't think it's intentional. It's also because some don’t realise women can do stuff.

Sunaina: Does it make you mad?

Heena: Now, it does! I stand up for myself, and people can't make me feel small anymore because I worked hard to get here.

Sunaina: How did you perceive and experience gender roles at home and in your surroundings while growing up?

Heena: Gender roles were strictly defined while growing up, but I see gradual changes. Some people are beginning to recognise that responsibilities aren't gender-bound. Yet, ingrained habits persist—like women automatically serving food or making morning coffee or tea for the family. I appreciate my father's progressive attitude; he doesn't expect my mother to cook or serve him and is willing to do these tasks.

But I want more. I don't want to think twice before buying something; I want to provide well for my children in the future. We've risen from a lower-middle-class family, and I want to work hard and change my circumstances.

In my family, women are achieving academic and professional success. My cousin, who attended the same school as me, now works in the UK, earns well, and started a jewellery business. She crafts the pieces herself. We never imagined such financial independence! And yet, I notice a lack of recognition for women's accomplishments. The family would likely praise effusively if a man had a full-time job and a side business. But my cousin's achievements go largely unacknowledged.

She offered me her jewellery as a gift during her visit to India. I insisted on paying because it’s a genuine business. She invests significant money, time, and effort into crafting each piece. It’s a legitimate business, not merely a hobby. A relative commented, "How does she have the time to do all this? Does she really have a job?"

Can you imagine someone from our generation saying that? Women-run businesses are underappreciated.

However, my father always hypes and believes in me, so when I go home, I don't feel any less than my brother.

Sunaina: Do you experience imposter syndrome?

Heena: All the time! Despite achieving the ISB milestone, self-doubt continues to linger. I can't make peace with the fact that I've worked hard and come quite far in life. I am overly reliant on external validation, seeking constant reassurance from managers and leadership.

Because of the syndrome, I don't trust my intuition much; it's essential to count on your gut feeling, right?

I'm a work-in-progress, and I'm determined to overcome these hurdles. Building self-confidence and accepting that I deserve to be here are my priorities.

Sunaina: What about the future excites you?

Heena: Product management genuinely excites me! I'm eager to expand my knowledge and skills within this domain, and I aim to take on leadership positions like AVP or VP in the future. So, I'm focused on honing my decision-making abilities and trusting my instincts. Plus, financial success is also a significant motivator.

My father's entrepreneurial journey is a constant source of inspiration. At my age, he explored various business ventures. He initially took over my grandfather's cloth business but felt it wasn't his calling. He ventured into opening a gym, which didn't succeed. He then tried to be an LIC agent and a property dealer. Finally, he found his niche with a confectionery store, which evolved into a successful wholesale FMCG business serving SMEs across and beyond our city.

Sunaina: That’s great! What's your advice for women entering the workforce?

Heena: Take ownership of your career. Don't passively wait for promotions or rewards; unabashedly ask for what you deserve. 

Set clear goals, prioritise tasks, and communicate openly with your leadership. Have regular check-ins with your leadership to show your visibility, and be candid enough to ask for more work if you aren't getting enough.

Ultimately, achieving your goals is on you.

That was my conversation with Heena Bajaj. You can follow her on LinkedIn to stay updated about her professional pursuits.

I’ll be back with another conversation soon! 👋